something about this just makes me feel old.



i lit a thin green candle


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from this distance it's almost like we're under attack-- the sounds of fireworks in the distance, like that venerable past of the american northeast and the battles fought here for a country that would go so wrong in so many ways. this holiday of cookouts and amateur rocketry tends to perplex me, even though i went to a display last year. i spent the first part of the day last summer moribund in the limited daylight of my room back in dracut, avoiding heat amid the droning summer sounds of the second self-titled red house painters album. by night: a car ride, a stop for ice cream, back roads and uncertain steps in darkness. the youthful spirit of home, the last gasp of it before the road trip we'd embark on a couple of days later and all that ended up meaning.

this year, nothing so artistic: a day off from work and more hours to pass until laura arrives on friday.

'indeed, conceit, arrogance, and egotism are the essentials of patriotism. let me illustrate. patriotism assumes that our globe is divided into little spots, each one surrounded by an iron gate. those who have had the fortune of being born on some particular spot, consider themselves better, nobler, grander, more intelligent than the living beings inhabiting any other spot. it is, therefore, the duty of everyone living on that chosen spot to fight, kill, and die in the attempt to impose his superiority upon all the others.'

-- emma goldman, 'patriotism: a menace to liberty'


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